#anyway WAILS
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with grace in your heart and flowers in your hair
#stars art#jf2#hilarious to put the jf2 spoiler tag on waht is literally just zoethian#zoethian#anyway WAILS#yogscast#rythian#zoeya
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what if she abstracts because of caine
#aw man shes all goopy#showtime so good when its just this#the amazing digital circus#tadc pomni#tadc caine#can i still tag this as a ship#yea#caine x pomni#tadc showtime#anyway if pomni abstracts in the show#im going to sob#even if she comes back#i love pomni sm i dont want anything bad to happen to her WAILS#(i say as i draw her abstracting anyway)
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CASTLEVANIA: NOCTURNE SEASON 2 DATE ANNOUNCEMENT
#em: edit#castlevania nocturne#castlevania: nocturne#castlevania netflix#i wish the video had better quality wails IT'S FINE#probs my extract thats bad... anyway y'all i'm so excited#i literally teared up when i heard alucard help
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I KNOW someone else has done this before and I cannot find that post for the life of me
This art is like a month old or something by now </3
#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#mabel pines#gravity falls mabel#dipper pines#gravity falls dipper#i dont know how to tag gravity falls fanart sobs and wails#anyway. forcing myself to post art because thats what i made this account for#OH SHIT I FORGOT TO TAG BILL#bill cipher#gravity falls bill#sock opera
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Still emotional about Fy'ra Rai and Opal, actually. Thought dump time bc i. dont have the energy to cut this down effectively.
Because at that point in the episode, Opal is doomed. Not in the fun little "oh things are getting worse ;)" kind of way we'd been experiencing leading up to the fight, or even IN the fight. At that point in the fight, Cyrus is dead. Dorian and Dariax have their minds twisted, bodies clambering away from the fight. Morrighan has felt, firsthand, just how far gone Opal is, holes in her mind, her friend broken. The heartbreaking sentence of. "You can always come back." understands that she is gone already. She's lost already. Opal has forgotten Ted. Opal has forgotten herself.
So at that point in the fight, we know Opal is doomed. Us as the audience, the cast, the characters. Aabria is running through each of the other crownkeepers and it is more of a goodbye than a round of combat. Defying the Spider Queen invites death, with zero hesitation- Cyrus's body as physical evidence of that. The terms were very clearly set: You leave Opal, you let her be lost. Or you die. (Leaving Opal anyway).
and Fy'ra Rai then. Grasps the crown, understands intimately that she can break it off and it will kill Opal. (I will free you, if you want me to. We would lose you but you would not be taken). And asks, what do you want me to do. What do you want.
and Opal says, I want you to leave. (I want you to live.) and Fy'ra Rai functionally says. No. Sorry. That's not one of the options.
If you wanted to go. I will do that (your blood on my hands). If you want me to stay, I will. But I'm not going to leave you.
There was the point where Fy'ra Rai broke into the communication and I felt my insides sink because. Look. Lets be real, Aabria had already demonstrated the stakes here. The gesture would not be rewarded for the gesture alone. The Spider Queen's terms were: You leave Opal. Or you die.
And Fy'ra Rai said: no.
I don't think I'm overstepping to assume that if Fy'ra Rai had failed the intimidation check, she would have died. This entire thing hits me so hard because I think Anjali knew that too. I think Fy'ra Rai knew that too. Yes, Fy'ra Rai convinced a Betrayer God to negotiate. She carved a third option out of a non-negotiable situation. She knew what would happen if she failed and did it anyway, with no fear, no regret, no waver in her resolve. She had lost enough sisters. She wasn't going to lose anymore, no matter the personal cost. That's part of why it succeeded, I'm sure, but.
Just. Fuck me. The amount of resolve. The amount of love. The amount of conviction. "I am. A protector." You know your friend- your sister- is doomed. So no more negotiating away from that. You step to her side and you grasp her hand and say- doom me with her.
And in some, sideways way, this saves you both, at least for a little while.
Because this story is a tragedy. This ending is a sad one. We know this already. But think about- Opal, under Lolth's bidding, alone in the dark. Think about Fy'ra Rai, alive, intimately aware that she had failed to protect yet another sister.
And think about what we got, instead: the two of them, in deep darkness, danger encroaching- holding hands. Someone they love at their side. A champion. And her champion.
This is still a sad story. But it's not the same one. Fy'ra Rai stared down a Betrayer God and made her change her mind. She stared down a Betrayer God, and her love and conviction changed the nature of the story. It shouldn't have been able to. But she did.
Fy'ra Rai chose to doom 2 people instead of one, and the sheer strength of her love and will managed to save them both, at least for a little while. Isn't it funny how that works? Isn't it devastating? Isn't it. fucking incredible?
#critical role#cr spoilers#c3e93#opal#EVERYONE CLAP FOR AABRIA AND ANJALI AND AIMEE BC I GO MORE FERAL THE LONGER I THINK ABOUT IT#character meta#fy'ra rai#fy'ra rai meta#opal meta#spar speaks#i had to get this out bc i cant Stop Thinking About it.... god..... she really Did That...#its not just about refusing to leave its understanding the consequence and facing it so unflinchingly that the narrative flinches first#UAHHHGGHH.#anjali bhimani do you know how much i respect you for this move. aabria iyengar do you know how much i respect you for setting up the stake#so clearly that this success(?) Hit the way it did. Aimee carrero do you know how much i respect you for how truly and devastatingly#you played opal while keeping the core of her character so poignant.#what the fucmkc. anyway im fine .#anyway this is why a lot of my devastated wailing is going to be reserved for dariax. and dorian. and cyrus.#my meta#FORGOT. I HAD THAT TAG. gotta go back and retag
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Idk man I just think that mizu/ena5 and its progression was really beautiful actually. I just think that the release of the ena5 song was also really beautiful and kind of the nail in the coffin for me and I haven't been able to get the event(s) out of my head all week and that I kind of want to talk about it, actually.
It's about being hurt so deeply and continuously that any kindness that could be offered to you manages to feel like a sin, that it makes you crumble and shatter but for all the wrong reasons, not because of the newfound safety, not out of relief, but something worse and more deeply ingrained in you than kindness ever was. It's about carefully measuring the distance at which you keep others away from yourself, to ensure that it never happens again ("To save yourself the trouble", if that makes it easier).
It's about realizing that the people you've been spending all this time with are drifting closer, that they just might bump up against the unsightly parts of yourself that you've tried to keep locked away, it's about turning around and sprinting at full speed and slamming the door shut and holding onto the handle behind you to stop it from turning, because you're as frightened of the possibility of another wound being inflicted on you as you are of the possibility that kinder, gentler hands will reach out and smooth over the exposed scar. It's about hating eyes that judge and silently condemn you as much as you hate eyes that simply see you and take all of you in without scrutiny, because no matter what they're looking and they're looking at you and they know that your hand's on that door handle and they know that you're hiding something because, as much as you try to keep it shut, they've seen through the crack that you foolishly left open.
(The prominence of eyes in Bake no Hana, specifically eyes looking and searching, and finally landing on you, the viewer, Mizuki, is so fucking. Visceral in my opinion. Every character in the MV stares at the viewer in a deadpan, almost judging way. Even though Mizuki knows deep down that niigo won't really hate them, won't judge them, she just can't stand their kindness either; any gaze directed at her is a loss, another prick in their skin. It screams "don't look at me" while making sure that you know, with horrific certainty, that they're looking for you, that you're being watched. You can't go outside, can't leave your room, because they're searching for you, and while that should be reassuring, to you it's anything but).
It's about not wanting to be dissected, whether it's with hands that want to pull your organs apart or stitch them back together because no matter what they're there, and they're getting frighteningly close to your heart. It's about blinding yourself and covering your eyes to it all because seeing means exposure and exposure means they're taking something from you and you can't do anything about it, much less take it all back, much less have a say in the matter. Everyone's just taking and taking and taking and you wish you could just be alone. You wish everyone would just disappear and you could live in a world all to yourself, for only yourself (but is that really what you want?).
It's about the way that, near the beginning of the Yoka ni Mitoreta MV, Mizuki and her loneliness is represented as a dark, splotchy stain in the shadows. No colors, no patterns, no way to clean it or wash it all away, just raw ugliness marring a blank canvas. It's about the way that Ena reaches out to it anyway, the way she startles when the glass shatters just when she finally starts reaching forward, the way that the rest of the MV/song represents her searching for and reaching only further out to Mizuki, even if the broken shards of glass will only cut her fingers, potentially leaving scars.
It's about how, in every way, subtly, directly, consciously, and subconsciously, Ena shows that she fucking cares.
It's about the way that Ena lets Mizuki have autonomy, despite the situation being so horribly out of their control. And it's such a delicate thing: If she really wants to, Mizuki can take the opportunity to just run away, keep running forever, repeat the cycle over and over, and maybe she'll just destroy herself with it again, but it can't be denied that it's something important to them, something she can't quite live without just yet, their means of survival. Mizuki's autonomy is their identity, it's her tailoring her own clothes and choosing her own ribbons and styling her own hair the way she does. Ena letting them have that is as much about trust as it is about understanding that Mizuki of all people should have this right, when control was something stripped from her throughout so much of her life. She couldn't control how she was born, how people look at her or why, can't control what they think of her; lacking control has only left Mizuki vulnerable to the cruelties of others, has only caused them to suffer, which is why it's so important that it's given to them now.
She had the control to make the choice to see niigo's welcoming love and run away instead of staying, and she has the control to make the choice now whether she wants to keep things the way they are or take a step forward to be at their side again. She has every right to have it, and I think the fact that Ena realizes and respects that, even if it's subconsciously, is really beautiful (there is an entire fucking Verse about this in the new song and just. God Look at this. It's so caring, unconditional, and for fucking What. I think there is something to be said about how much Ena is willing to put aside for Mizuki, and maybe deep down it isn't healthy, but for now I'm just kind of in awe)
It's about how insanely patient Ena has been this whole time. Mizuki says that she basically lied to Ena's face about telling her their secret, even after Ena said with such conviction that she would wait for Mizuki as long as it takes, and Ena is just kept waiting and waiting and worrying like this seemingly indefinitely. It's about how Mizuki danced around it, avoided it, kept the distance, straight up ran when she was finally pushed, but Ena still chased anyway when she saw that she couldn't wait anymore, kept chasing just enough to intervene and get a straight answer out of Mizuki when she really needed to, but still leaving her enough space to leave if that was truly what she wanted. It's about how relieved Ena is the moment that Mizuki finally says outright how much they want to be with her and niigo, how much she wants to try, how much more light Ena's voice sounds when she grabs her hand, relieved, the way that the relief she feels can be felt through the music, throughout the entirety of Yoka ni Mitoreta, the way that warm colors always follow her when she chases after Mizuki, just to hold onto her and stop her from running away completely.
It's about how that careful combination of Ena's directness, Ena's persistence, Ena's warmth, her patience, her bluntness about her feelings, the way she chases and holds on but not too tight and her regard for how unsafe and exposed Mizuki feels actually works and breaks it all down. It's about how she really did reach through to Mizuki, despite the thorns and broken glass shards and nearly-unfulfilled promises, the way that Mizuki did finally let her turn the door handle and step through to see what she'd been hiding all this time, the way that Mizuki's hand, limp, when Ena first grabs onto it, shifts to hold hers back as they cry in the face of Ena's gentleness.
Despite how harsh Mizu/Ena5, and even Ena herself as a character can be (or at least was in the very beginning of pjsk), everything is somehow gentle and warm in the end, blindingly so. And you know what, I think that's beautiful. And what's even more beautiful than that is how Mizuki allows themself to crumble and shatter under that kindness, that warm light, but this time, finally, out of relief.
On a final note, I just want to say that I also appreciate how all that didn't have to solve everything. The scars haven't disappeared, haven't gone away, and Mizuki knows that their desire to run hasn't gone away forever, and maybe it never truly will. But for now they've calmed it, at least a little. She's learning to allow herself to be seen, learning that when someone's fingertips brush over their scars the way Ena's did that it's only out of care, and that maybe taking in that care and allowing herself to feel kindness and safety is okay. They're safe, for now, somehow. They're learning. They're trying. And I think that's cool :)
#txt#pjsk#project sekai#mizuki akiyama#akiyama mizuki#ena5#ena shinonome#shinonome ena#25 ji nightcord de#niigo#n25#mizuena#i'll tag it for the shippers too bc why not they'll enjoy this#closing my eyes and hitting post because on one hand i want to keep editing this because it's a mess but if i spend another minute on this#I Will explode#physically i have moved on mentally i am still staring at that damn card on my monitor while the music swells and mizuki is wailing out#that damn image has like actually rearranged my brain chemistry it's not even funny#i'm so fucking weak for this specific character dynamic/relationship yeah it might be cliche yeah i'm lame whatever#but like. FUCKKKK THEY DID IT SO WELL. THIS IS ACTUALLY INSANE. they put so much care into mizuki as a character it's crazy#oh mizuki. i hope you find peace and happiness.#i hope you look around you and the people you've surrounded yourself with one day and realize that you've found safety#anyways yeah sorry this is incomprehensible nonsense also sorry if the pronouns were confusing i hc she/they for mizuki#y'know partway through writing this i half considered turning this around into a fic but like. nahhhhh. tumblr text word vomit it is#sorry about the *checks* 1.4K word text ramble. but thanks for reading if you got here B))
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more of that bfu mawsm au also a closeup of that cat, specifically:
#my adventures with superman#mawsm bfu au#my art#doodles#I CANT DRAW MOTION BLUR :wail:#I tried my best here#clark kent#lois lane#jimmy olsen#anyway how often do you guys think this happens
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never over the fact that han yoohyun remains also a victim of child neglect/abandonment/having adult responsibilities foisted upon him too young even as he grows up under yoojin’s care. it’s not yoojin’s fault, he did his best and he did good raising yoohyun but. you’re not supposed to be able to hurt your parent, you’re not supposed to learn how to manage your parent’s emotions/wellbeing/public image, you’re not supposed to have to fear for their physical safety and desperately try to figure out a way to protect them, you’re not supposed to be capable of real cruelty toward them, not supposed to be able to fuck up their life. but your parent is your brother who is only five years older than you, and suddenly the new and dangerous world demands you (you who are new and dangerous too) in its spotlight, and you are just a child and he was just a child. the world is so wholly unjust to both of them and i will never fault either for how their relationship was in shambles for three/eight years, even when han yoohyun makes his terrible decisions with terrible consequences, paving the road to hell. you’re not supposed to be able to hurt your parent like that. you’re not supposed to be a brother that he needs to rely on, just as much as you rely on him, both of you abandoned.
haven’t even mentioned yet how you’re not really human you don’t understand humans you try your best for your brother but you Don’t Get It, how and why society works and the full emotional harm its hatred can wreak. you might see it but you don’t get it like physical danger and there is so much of that latter danger in the world now. you might see him and keep tabs on him but you don’t get your brother, that he needs you like you need him because of the very fact that you need him and children realizing their parents are complete emotional beings is not something that should happen before you learn to stand on your own. and learning to stand on your own, paradoxically and inevitably, takes much longer when you are forced to grow up too fast. you are forced to mature too early and so you are immature in ways invisible. so many flavors of terrible responsibilities foisted upon them that no one should ever bear (raising a child while you are a child/the world is on fire and so are you/your parent also needs you to bear your shared emotional burden).
it’s so unfair. i’m bundling them both up in a blanket. han yoojin’s childhood was stolen away so he could give this simulacrum of a childhood to his brother but the world is terrible and yoojin is just a child too and it’s not possible it’s not his fault that the wonderful beautiful childhood he built is not, cannot be the bulwark in the face of brutal reality, that delicate childhood shaped by hands still so small too.
#hi i just got here. feeling something about children forced to grow up too soon and tragic siblings#by feeling something i mean im gnashing my teeth and wailing#han yoohyun#han yoojin#the han brothers#s classes that i raised#sctir meta#meta#meta from k#if there are no hyh defenders i am dead (hyj voice)#referencing post i rbed: he’s neurodivergent and a minor i can’t hate him#parentification#child neglect#sctir spoilers#(?) to be safe i think the nonhumanity of hyh is implied pretty early but you know. cant be too safe#anyway. semi related fic incoming
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"I'm... I'm here to tell you..." To tell him what? That it's fine? That I don't hate you? That everything is fine? That I don't blame you for having killed Jin ZiXuan? It was impossible. But she couldn't say anything that was the opposite either. And so, she didn't know what else she could say to Wei Wei WuXian, under such circumstances. It was just that she felt like she had to see this brother of hers once more. / "You ran so fast, I could hardly get a look at you."
The Untamed vs Leonard Cohen's Famous Blue Raincoat
#there is an EXCELLENT jiang cheng wei wuxian edit out there to this song and i think jiang yanli deserves a little leonard cohen too <3#as a treat <3#just that line that i guess that i miss you i guess i forgive you!#and yes i DID change the last line so it suits her final sacrifice better#that quote is from the novel which i am becoming frighteningly close to reading one day#anyway!#jiang yanli#the untamed#theuntamededit#that shot of her and wei wuxian staring at each other her in her mourning clothes is one of my favorite shots in the show it makes me WAIL#so apologies for using it in every edit ever#also if you're wondering why no gifs? my screenrecorder function is buggy so :/ screenshots only for me alas
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even miles draws her with the trans pride colors like it's not even funny at this point
#this is half a joke so no one start crying and wailing over trans people in the replies#sick of u mfs#anyways shes trans real#spiderverse#across the spiderverse#gwen stacy#ghost spider#spider gwen#miles morales#gwiles#ghostflower#aloeverants#trans gwen stacy
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Do you think Donnie would make a prosthetic for when uh Toast exists? :0 (hope I’m remembering names eudgdjdg)
No prosthetic for Toast, alas 😔
Slightly related, the port does work and Sprouts old arm can attach on though! Its just not the right size by any means haha!
#sometimes I feel bad for not giving poptart a prosthetic because it leaves poor donnie with nothing to do WAILS#2 arms left#asks#freshavocado#rottmnt#anyways guess what crew#my weekend is here#lets see how much toast I can draw#I might tryyyy and see if I can do the first fusion reaction comic#after I finish up something else
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no no you guys don't get it. the x files cancer arc was, excuse the pun, a fucking white whale of a tv plotline that would not have worked nearly as well on literally any other show. it was a complete hail mary. the writers' room nearly didn't make it happen because they were worried it would fall too deeply into soap opera territory. and on any other show, it would! but the x files is about four key things: mistrust in the government, faith in both science and the otherworldly, building a life around trauma, and the fine line between love and codependency. it is the only show where the entirety of this situation- a government experiment on an unwilling young catholic leads to a terminal illness that is counteracted by a literal scientific miracle in the eleventh hour due to her partner's refusal to accept her impending death- could both happen at all and happen well. none of the themes in the cancer arc were new to txf at all. they'd all been lurking, to some extent, in the background since the pilot. the cancer arc wasn't merely milking a left-field catastrophe for the drama, it shoved the overarching themes of the show to the front and said look. look what these people are to each other. look how impossible it is to face the darkness alone. regardless of when the plotline was conceived, it was always going to happen. it was the only way the story could have ever gone. they were always doomed from the beginning
#the writers also- and this is going to be a very unpopular opinion i'm sure- did themselves HUGE favors#by keeping mulder & scully still SO emotionally uptight and miscommunicative even though it would be so easy not to#because it feels REAL. this is how these characters would really react to these circumstances#they wouldn't suddenly become all sappy. they wouldn't talk to each other. they wouldn't know HOW#mulder would always just grieve and grieve and grieve and throw his life away to save her#wail silently into her bedclothes so his anguish doesn't burden her further#and scully would always insist that she's fine. she wouldn't leave him for anything not even her own health#she would never be able to tell him that she's scared of what he'd do when she was gone. she loves him far too much#anyway. is this coherent#arwen.text#the x files
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Tired: Rise!Splinter is a neglectful and awful father who doesn’t care about his kids >:(
Wired: Rise!Splinter’s negligence comes from a place of deep trauma that he’s carried with him his whole life – losing his mother, having been betrayed by the love of is life, being imprisoned and forced to fight for his life, used as an experiment and subsequently being mutated and losing his whole identity as a person – and while it certainly doesn’t excuse his behavior, there is no doubt that this man loves his sons fiercely despite his own shortcomings and perhaps it is exactly that love and care that causes him to keep his children at arms length in hopes to spare them his family’s cursed legacy that grooms them into martyrs and are thus destined to die young, a sacrifice for the greater good that Splinter is never willing to make even if it means forfeiting the world to the Shredder. Splinter’s journey of fatherhood began by being completely unprepared as a fresh young single father of four young children that depend on him to survive and there is no surprise he’s hit almost every bump there possibly is when raising a child but never in his life has Splinter ever blamed or resented his children in any way – he is not perfect and he’s aware and he tries to do better all because he loves his kids this fucking much bc despite all the shit he’s been through, those kids made him realize that he can try again. to dismiss him as an awful father is a gross mischaracterization of a deeply traumatized man of color who evidently tried his fucking hardest not to pass on the hurt onto his own children while grappling with his own demons and the crushing destiny of his family’s blood line that took away his mother.
#rottmnt#hamato yoshi#hamato splinter#turtle files: meta#guys i am so unwell about him#he's literally so!! i love he!!!#this guy's been to hell and back and yet!! and yet!! here is still!!#HERE IS STILL!! RAISING KIDS!!#HE KNOWS FUCK ALL BUT THEY DEPEND ON HIM AND THAT IS ENOUGH#i need to lie down#i am literally so [starts wailing sobbing crying]#the next omo chapter's gonna be a doozy boys#anyway dont mind me#teh number one splinter defender#KSJSJKBDBKJDBJKF#I JUST FEEL A LOT ABOUT HIM OKAY#as someone who comes from an asian family with generational trauma...#bro. BRO.
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best ending: they talk it out after lewis wins his 8th wdc and we end up with brocedes in each other's lives again. lewis shows up on nico's yt channel. nico is on lewis' insta. vivian dogwalks both of them for letting the divorce last that long. i join the convent because this is clearly a miracle from god and reblog gifsets of brocedes interacting from the chapel. rinse, repeat.
ending we're most likely gonna get: whatever the hell we have now. nico talks about lewis. lewis will say karting is the best time of his career. for two seconds out of the year, lewis will say nico's name. i will sob, rinse, repeat.
worst ending: they shut the fuck up about each other forever. they process the divorce and move on with their lives without each other. i will go on tumblr and reblog angsty web weaves about their relationship and what could've been. i take psychic damage. rinse. repeat.
#inshallah we get the best ending#but we will most likely get the middle one#obviously them processing the divorce is best for each other and like it's none of our business but as a bystander to their fallout#i think i deserve emotional compensation in teh form of knowing exactly what they are to each other#my family is sick of me wailing about them#if you'd've told me last year (casual f1 watcher/knew bits of the lore but didn't really care that much) that i would one day be sobbing#over a rivalry that happened when i was in elementary/middle school i woulda laughed soo fuckin hard#anyway vivian ik you're richer than god and you probably don't need it but i hope you're getting paid 8 figures for putting up w brocedes#f1#lewis hamilton#nico rosberg#brocedes
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The unfortunate part of enjoying spec bio stuff and wanting to integrate it into hcs for existing characters is that i also have to be smart enough to know what im talking about. Thats fucking impossible
#chattin#i want to make clark a plant soooo bad but unfortunately that means i need to know how plants work#and thats hard.#i want to make him a water bear and thats even harder. wails .#the good thing is that my bullheadedness compels me to sit and do research anyway#so like#it will happen. eventually. at a snails pace …
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let it be known that solomon isn't holding ik's hand to protect her; ik is holding solomon's hand to comfort him
(this is that comic idea i had that ended up becoming the rpg au)
#(slamming fists into ground) (wailing) i don't know how to draw backgrouuuuuuunds#art#obey me#obey me solomon#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#jtta ik#also they're very briefly there but i'll tag em anyway:#obey me simeon#obey me luke#jtta aus#rpg au#these designs are veeery shaky by the way#i wanted to give everyone a little twist on their hair so now diavolo has a ponytail and barbatos... his hair's just a bit fluffier#yeah i couldn't think of anything for him#solomon and ik have matching braids :)#also solomon's outfit is based on flynn rider (with the colours from his casual outfit in-game)
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